Overall, it was a good week. Can’t really complain. Although, as Saturday is nearing an end and I’m feeling quite exhausted I have to admit I’m looking forward to vegging in front of the t.v. tomorrow watching the Super Bowl. Granted, there will be a pile of laundry sitting next to me getting folded, but I’m going to try and not be a chore monster all day and do as little house stuff as possible and do as much playing on the carpet with my kiddos as I can.
Devil Pup has handled the week really well. See, he’s a complete Daddy’s boy. We all know our children love both parents, but we also see where one can often times be favored over the other. I’m ok with this. I love that my son and his Daddy have the bond that they have. Especially since the last 3 years Mr. SF was very busy on Recruiting Duty. To help with that we made Sunday the Daddy day where it would be just he and DP hanging out together, which I think was a major key in their guy bonding. And I really do love it. They have that special connection that a father and son should have.
But now, Daddy isn’t here.
And this is what helps to reinforce my original thoughts on why deployment is easier than recruiting duty. It’s steady. Ok, no Mr. SF isn’t deployed at the moment, he’s only in the field for the month. Nothing super major. For DP, though, I thought it might be. However, as said, he’s taking it really well. He understands that Daddy is a Marine, and sometimes Marines have to do their work in places that are far away from home, and that we can’t go visit him. That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t miss his daddy, though. Twice this week we did have some moments of pouty lips and tears, “I just want Daddy to be home again so I can give him hugs”, and “I just am missing Daddy.” And he asks if Daddy will be here in the mornings when he wakes up. “No, where is Daddy?”, I ask. “He’s in 29 poms, cus he has to work for lots of days”
And I think that’s the hardest part. You can’t really expect a 3 year old to understand the difference between a day, a weekend, week, or month. They are still very much in the now. So, even with the ‘Daddy Comes Home’ chain that we made, the time aspect has still been the biggest hurdle. I think. I’m definitely not dismissing his emotions and that he does miss Daddy and wants him home, but the daily not being here is a steady routine that we’ve easily adjusted to. When Mr. SF was on recruiting duty, seeing him was a day to day variable. The ‘when does Daddy get home?’ literally changed on a daily basis, and with this so did the stress of not seeing him. I am convinced it’s because of the lack of routine. Now, Daddy isn’t home and he won’t be home until we’ve taken the last link off of the chain. Before, I couldn’t give him an answer, and if there’s anything I’ve learned is that toddlers really do seem to NEED those answers. Maybe, possibly, sort of, hopefully… these are all variables that just don’t quite make sense yet.
So anyway, with only 2 little tearful hiccups this week, I’d say overall DP is doing very well. While maintaining the house, raising twins and toddler, and all the in betweens leaves me pretty exhausted by 9pm, I’m fairly excited about the overall results of this week. I’m left feeling a little more confident in knowing I’ll be able to handle the days when the real deployment comes.
Well, I already know I [as in just myself] will be able to handle it. The first time Mr. SF was overseas was pre-kiddo’s, so I have already experienced it. My worry has mostly been on how my children will handle it, and that I can maintain my sanity while keeping everything else together. So far so good. Naturally, Hooty & Pooty don’t know what’s going on, though today I was getting the feeling that maybe they might be missing him. I’m not sure. Hooty has been extra clingy the last couple of days. Eventually, however, the girls will actually know what this is all about and I’ll get to experience their reactions, which may very well be completely different from DP’s. My hope is that by then their big brother will be able to help them ease through it.
Either way, this is our life as a USMC family, and I know we will always be able to get through it together.
For now I’m just happy with how this week has gone, and that we get to use this month as a way to test the waters for what’s to come in the future.
It is hard to explain. However, I have a few books that have helped. The favorite in the house, and the one that's been read by request every night, is 'A Salute To Our Heroes The U.S. Marines'. He absolutely loves it!
As far as the chain goes, I think the days changing is my only fear. Luckily at 3 I don't think he'd notice if I added 1 or 2 at night if need be… as long as it doesn't get TOO close.
That's interesting, our Husbands are training in the same place right now… It was also our very first Duty station, where my daughter was born (almost 8 years ago).
I also have a 3 year old. It's so hard trying to explain to him why Daddy is away…
I used to do the paper chains with my daughter. But when Hubby leaves for training I never know the exact day he is coming back and its usually a week time span on when. So I had stopped doing the chains.
Thank you, I really appreciate that!
The bacon salt is GREAT! TY. I love it.
I am so in awe of Military wives. My hubby travels A LOT but it's always in short increments and I get to talk, skype, text and email while he's away. So I applaud you and all the other Semper Fi mommas out there. You inspire me. And? Hows that bacon salt?